A Torn Heart

Dedicated to Terry Shiotanni

As my six-month commitment to no dating came to an end, a certain gentleman knew about my wait, and was looking forward to asking me out. Actually, he asked if I would be interested in courting with the intention of possible marriage. Wow, I thought, he moves fast. I knew how to respond after spending six months with Jesus, and reading a few books about dating/ courting God’s way.

I responded with… “I’d like to hang out together with our group of friends.” I also asked if he knew of a Godly couple who would disciple or mentor us if we chose to court/date each other, (I also read that having a mentor is wise). I had just moved to San Diego,

and was attending a Calvary Chapel Church close to my new home by the beach. His church was in San Diego as well, just further east, called Maranatha Chapel (a Calvary Chapel). He asked a couple he respected at his church if they would be interested in mentoring us.

Their answer was, “we have to pray about it.” This couple had a Thursday night Bible study in their home, and he knew their marriage was built on God’s Word. After prayer, they agreed to meet with us both over lunch. While we were at lunch, the couple asked insightful questions which would have been too premature for me to ask. As he answered their questions, a red flag blared before me. I knew from this lunch encounter not to move forward with him, and we were to remain just friends. Thank God. I was so grateful to God for not jumping into a relationship with him. I must say though, I fell in love with the couple, and asked the woman if she would consider mentoring me. She of course responded, “I’ll pray about it.” She contacted me the following week and invited me to their Thursday night Bible study, and off I went. The most wonderful relationship in my life had just begun. She’s my mentor to this day and a most trusted friend as well. God used her in my life on many levels. She constantly pointed me to Jesus, and was a prayer warrior not to be messed with. She was grounded in God’s Word, and before she would answer my questions, she would show me scripture which would confirm God’s answer. She is a woman who follows and submits to her husband as the Word calls us women to do. Her husband is a blessed man. She is the crown on his head. She is the example in my life of a woman who truly understands God’s call in being her husband’s helpmate. She is truly a surrendered woman that loves Jesus whole-heartedly and enjoys her freedom in Christ. I want to thank you Terry… I love you.

Pray for a Godly mentor.

If God puts a woman on your heart to mentor you, seek her out and ask. Commit to meeting with her at least once a week.

Terry and I spoke on the phone often. She was always available to me. Growing in the Lord is never ending in life. What I loved about Terry is she would meet me where I was spiritually, and would help me move to the next level in my maturity in the Lord. She had patience. Terry also never lorded over me but gently lead me. No one should ever make your decisions in life but God. Your mentor should always lead you to the Lord in prayer, and let Him speak to your heart. Your mentor should be trusted to keep what you share in her safe keeping; a gossip is dangerous to your heart. I believe it is also good to have many counselors as God’s Word in Proverbs 11:14 says, “Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety”.

Scriptures:

“A talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter”
Proverbs 11:13
“Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety”
Proverbs 11:14
“For by wise counsel you will wage your own war, and in a multitude of counselors there is safety”
Proverbs 24:6
“Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out”
Proverbs 20:5